Thursday 5 March 2009

Blame

He has sent his justification.
Words typed out and no doubt believed by him - that I did this.

I pushed.
Him, too far.

He left.
He had enough, he says.
he truly has tried, he says.

He knows he is loved. He has no doubt.
Funny about that.
with me
He is upset because the long alone hours, waiting with no word or no yearning on his part towards me translated in my mind and heart spoke of no love or desire to be WITH me when I lived through it.
How dare I not know he loves me because he stayed.

So does that mean since he left, he no longer loves me ( even by his standards?)

What is love?

7 comments:

  1. it sounds to me like lack of communication, the biggest killer of most relationships.... been there, done that. If there is still feelings there for each other, maybe you should both take a weekend off.. BY YOURSELVES.. talk things through. Turn off all cell phones and concentrate on each other.

    That's the only advice I can give from so far away... sorry. {{{hugs}}}

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  2. I agree with Dorrie. Communication is so important in a relationship. Would he be willing to spend some one on one time with you, to talk things through? That might either help bring closure to this, or maybe get you re-united. Hoping things turn out OK. HUGS!!!

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  3. It's hard to say what's going on with him. He says he left because you felt he didn't love you? He didn't want you to say that out loud, even though his actions allowed you to think it?
    Perhaps he's trying to assuage his guilt.
    To me, love is a partnership and you don't bail when things aren't as good as they usually are.
    I hope he's not messing with your head. *hugs*

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  4. He won't talk unless I just shut up and listen. And not say one thing that intimates that I am unhappy. Then he stops. Listening or talking. I do not walk away when things get tough. He did.

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  5. Aw Maggie, I'm sorry. People have a right to say what might be hurting them. I know you wouldn't walk away. I think perhaps the problem lies within himself.

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  6. Blame game.

    Know what that means? He isn't willing to accept his own responsibility in the matter.

    You do not need this. I have no idea what purpose this letter serves. It actually makes me upset and disappointed in him.

    Are you perfect? No. SO WHAT? I wonder if he accepts any responsibility.

    What's next Maggs? Which way now? Take care of you.

    Love,
    Bobby

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  7. No, he accepts no responsibility. He believes it is all me. I don't. I have asked him NOT to keep going over the same ground, and attributing blame. I have told him i believe all that does is continue to hurt, us both and accomplishes nothing. I asked him to write down what he wants and needs and I will do the same. We can meet swap lists and see if we are able to find a way FORWARD. That meeting will bring either closure or a plan, a way.

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